The goal is to be quick and nimble, transforming into a scrumptious piece of doughy byproduct without overcooking yourself. More specifically, you're a slice of bread attempting to maneuver its way to a heat source to become toast. Like puns about baked goods or any kind of food stuffs, it’s good fun for a while, but you should probably quit while you’re a bread.It's the greatest thing since sliced.nevermind.īrought to us by the same minds that gave us Surgeon Simulator 2013, I Am Bread is a game where you are bread. I might put it on to show friends, but I probably won’t sit for hours trying to perfect my score. With its ever-present suggestion to take screenshots, this is clearly a game meant to be shared for laughs, built for YouTubers and streamers. None of these modes has much longevity, but that’s okay. Cheese Hunt is the most interesting: the search encourages exploration rather than the shortest route, and since crackers lose edibility through breakage rather than dirt you’ll change how you play. Each also has its own mode to suit its movement style: a race through checkpoints for the bagel, a destruction mode for the baguette, and a cheese hunt for the cracker. Once you’ve completed the story, free play is available across all seven locations with four kinds of bread. It’s dark and gets darker, which is a delightful juxtaposition with the cartoony graphics, comical animation, and irritatingly jaunty music. The story kept me going too, told in therapist reports before each level. In the garden I managed to light a match to use on the barbecue only to discover the flame was toasting the slice itself. Only the kitchen has a toaster the other levels have multiple alternative solutions to discover. Despite many reused assets, as the guy moves his possessions from room to room, each level has something new. I also gave up because I wanted to see the new locations, one for each of the seven days of story mode. The first time I got an F I was indignant and sought redemption, but when I realised how long it would take to improve I gave up and used the magic marmalade that appears after a few failed attempts and makes you invulnerable to inedibility. Those risks are particularly frustrating when performance is scored with a grade based on time, edibility, and the evenness of the toast. It can knock over a skateboard in an attempt to ride it across a room only to glitch through it and end up pinned to the filthy floor. Unfortunately, in this world bread can also spasm into unrecognisable shapes at inopportune moments. Its grip is strong enough for vertical ascent up walls and fridges, and each slice has enough heft to knock over chairs, swing open cupboard doors, or smash open jam jars to bathe itself in contents sticky enough to let it rest and recover its grip even on vertical surfaces. Maybe that’s why my bread never goes anywhere. To make decent progress, you need to use the powerful grips on each corner, one per button, to flip or fling it greater distances. (Sorry.) The analog stick (or arrow keys, if you really hate yourself) alone will only nudge the slice along in short jolts. Like Surgeon Simulator, it’s no easy rise. Not everyone is as delicate as me, but I am Bread has other ways of causing pain. The first time I saw my slice crawling with ants, I felt sicker than a game has ever made me The first time I saw my slice crawling with ants, I felt sicker than any game has ever made me, and I recently watched a friend play through all the fatalities in Mortal Kombat X. This is an uncomfortable game for somebody with germophobia, especially when surfaces I’d never touch with my bare hands in real life-toilet seats, bins-don’t impact edibility at all.
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